shooter

[morgue_n]

 I had a dream last night that I was outside a school in the evening, and a mass shooter showed up.

He was overweight and had shaggy, stringy hair, as if he didn't wash or take care of himself. His patchy beard stretched from his cheeks down his neck. He wore all black, and straps, patches, and pockets covered his XXL tactical vest. He was holding an AR 15. I knew there were kids in the school for the dance that night. 

I changed my voice to be softer, quieter. I eliminated all fear from my body language. I walked towards him. I told him that I might understand him. I asked him why he was doing this. He said he couldn't stand it anymore. 

I told him I couldn't either. I turned that hate inward, and I struggled with hating myself. I told him I cut sometimes. I wondered out loud if he dealt with that same hate, but if he turned it outward. 

What I said shook him, and I walked up to him. I could smell his sweat and body odor. I don't know when the last time he showered was. I hugged him and told him we could get through this. 

I felt my shoulder get wet as he broke down. I held him up.

when i let him go, he was already gone. I heard gunshots from within the school. That's when I woke up